Saturday, October 5, 2019

Spook Out! Day 5 ~ The Eyes of My Mother (2016, In English and Portuguese w/Subtitles)

Netflix Says...
"At the remote farmhouse where she once witnessed a traumatic childhood event, a young woman develops a grisly fascination with violence."

I Say...
Dudes. I don't even know what to say, except that the Netflix blurb doesn't prepare you for what you're about to experience when you settle down to watch this movie. It's disturbing af and it'll stay with you a while.

Horror Type...
American Gothic, Indie/Arthouse Horror (A.A. Dowd's review for avclub.com says, "If Ingmar Bergman had helmed The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, it might look something like this exquisite nightmare." That's exactly right. You can read the full review here but beware, thar be spoilers.

Main Players...
Kika Magalhães as Francisca (She only wants somebody to love, is that so wrong?)
Olivia Bond as young Francisca (Handy with a needle)
Will Brill as Charlie (Nope. Just nope.)

I liked...
  • how beautifully this is shot, in hushed black and white, lending it a dark-folktale quality
  • the boldness of writing a female character who performs horrors typically considered within the purview of men (in fiction and in reality)--but in a completely believable way, given how her formerly-a-surgeon-mother was raising her
  • how it engrossed me throughout, even as my gut churned with dread and disbelief
  • that it features Portuguese folk, y'all! My peeps, my language, my tribe--Viva Portugal!
  • the sparse use of dialogue, especially as it made reading subtitles without coming out of the story a breeze

The Meh...
  • it's slightly shorter than a standard feature (1 hour, 16 minutes) yet at times I wondered whether it'd ever end...probs due to the sick feeling in my stomach every time some new, darker horror emerged
  • the narrative's a wee bit choppy--when I read the Wikipedia plot summary I realized I'd utterly failed to connect a particular set of dots so I had to rewatch that portion to grok it
  • I don't know whose fault this is but two important sentences were mis-subtitled: at one point, one subtitle reads, "What am I going to do?" when what Francisca actually said was, "Eu preciso de alguém, mãe." ("I need somebody, mom.") Another time, the subtitle reads, "I wanted to make you proud," though Francisca said, "Isto é tão difícil sem ti, mãe." ("This is so hard without you, mom.") For each mis-titling, the actual dialogue is far superior to the bad translations, and so vital to the story! Ugh.

Would I recommend it...?
It's a brilliant, visually gorgeous, and unique take on a story often told and I highly recommend it to mature lovers of horror and film. I don't understand how this flick didn't totally blow up when it was released, but it's extremely worthy and deserves a lot of attention. NB: If you're of a sensitive disposition, as I am (I know, you wouldn't think it, considering some of the stuff I like) maybe try watching it the way I did: on a sunshiny Saturday morning, so you have time to process it and, if necessary, go do some fun stuff so you can sleep that night*.

Miscellany...
  • For a gal who's lived her entire life in isolation, probably not even going to school or having any other females in her life to talk about makeup and whatnot, Francisca's eyebrows are remarkably tidy
  • The guy who played Charlie looked so danged familiar! Turns out he also plays The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel's brother, Noah Weissman, who's secretly working for the CIA. Fella's got some serious acting chops--he utterly terrified me during the brief moments he was onscreen in The Eyes of My Mother

Ratings...
My Grade: A-
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: Tomatometer=78%, Audience Score=57%

Details, Schmeetails...
I Watched The Eyes of My Mother on Netflix (the Rotten Tomatoes page linked above provides links to other host sites)
The Eyes of My Mother's Wikipedia Page (Contains Spoilers)

*One way I process disturbing movies or TV shows is to read others' reviews. Here I've linked a few for The Eyes of My Mother but be warned, as in the link up top, thar be spoilers (aplenty). Please note: I agree with some, though not all, thoughts expressed in the following reviews.

Don’t be fooled by the artfulness: The Eyes Of My Mother is deeply f*ck*d up (I linked to this earlier in the post)

Eyes of My Mother review: a horror film about unimaginable response to unimaginable tragedy



The concludes Day 5 of

Spook Out! Day 4 ~ Marianne (Netflix Series 2019, in French w/Subtitles and/or Dubbing)

Netflix Says...
"Lured back to her hometown, a famous horror writer discovers that the evil spirit who plagues her dreams is now wreaking havoc in the real world."

I Say...
Enfant terrible-type manifests her own Freddy-style nightmare, only Freddy would probably poop his pants if he ever met this titular horror.

Horror Type...
Supernatural

Main Players...
Victoire Du Bois as Emma Larsimon (Witch Magnet)
Lucie Boujenah as Camille (Put-Upon Sidekick)
Mireille Herbstmeyer as Mrs Daugeron (Main Manifestation of Marianne, who needs to win ALL the awards for her work in this series. Yes, ALL THE AWARDS!)

I liked...
  • that it's so gal-centric (girl pow-ah!)
  • how it's just sooooooo deliciously creepy!
  • the humorous notes that help take the edge off
  • learning why Emma Larsimon is actually less enfant terrible and more sacrificial lamb (kinda)
  • the quirky inspector who joins in the fight against eeeeeeviiiiiiiiilllllll
  • the seaside setting (LOVE me the ocean, man!)
  • the various ways in which the protagonists strive against the wicked witch-spirit
  • the soundtrack; it's groovy, baby, yeah!

The Meh...
  • Yeah, subtitles can be a pain, and with the speed of the dialogue in this, challenging. But I tried watching a bit with the English dubbing and I have to say, it is le crap.
  • Without going all spoilery, there's a kind of reveal toward the end which I found a bit cheesy. But I still love this series.

Would I recommend it...?
Oui, oui, mille fois oui! Which is to say, absolument! By which I mean, yes.

Miscellany...
  • OK, technically, I watched the series in September. But as I mentioned previously, I was short of movies for a few days of the month, so there you go--you now have perfect binge-watching material for the weekend. You're welcome.
  • I feel obliged to warn my fellow authors that Marianne does not give une merde about your writer's block. Écris!!!

Ratings...
My Grade: A
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: Average Tomatometer=100%, Average Audience Score=89%

Details, Schmeetails...


This concludes Day 4 of

Thursday, October 3, 2019

Spook Out! Day 3 ~ Culture Shock (2019)

Hulu Says...
"This thriller follows a young Mexican woman in pursuit of the American Dream, who crosses illegally into the United States, only to find herself in an American nightmare."

I Say...
Gritty thriller bends into bizarre techno-drama as a determined woman seeks a better future for herself and her unborn child.

Horror Type...
Thriller, Surreal, Technological

Main Players...
Martha Higareda as Marisol Ramirez (American Dreamer)
Richard Cabral as Santo Cristobal (Assassin?)
Barbara Crampton as Betty (Hostess from Hell?)

I liked...
  • that Marisol suffers some knock-downs but persists, in a realistic way (she's not suddenly some amazing fighting badass after some cheesy workout montage)
  • that she doesn't become embittered by all the crap she goes through--her heart only grows stronger
  • that an assassin-by-profession (apparently?) turns out to be one of the most decent dudes in this flick (and there are a number of seriously bad guys, so that's really saying something), which just goes to show that you never know
  • the tightly-written, clearly delineated three-act structure (and I even liked that I felt exhausted from the tension of the first act by the time it yielded to the second)

The Meh...
Not gonna lie, some of the gritty reality experienced in that grueling first act is really hard to witness. Though the ending satisfies, you may want to plan on taking in some more light-hearted fare as a palate cleanser afterward. Also, Marisol makes a big decision at the end that I'm not altogether sure she's making for the right reason. However, I can't say it's the wrong decision...

Would I recommend it...?
As a thriller, absolutely. As a horror movie, maybe not so much, but terror's in the eye and mind of the beholder. (Mind you, the excellent Barbara Crampton's facial expressions in this are pretty danged freaky.)

Miscellany...
  • Culture Shock is the tenth feature-length installment in Hulu's horror anthology Into the Dark. (They've released one movie a month with a theme central to that month's holiday--as observed in the US, at least. Culture Shock was the Independence Day offering.)
  • Creed Bratton (who plays Creed...Bratton (say what?) in The Office) portrays one of Culture Shock's many Bad Guys.

Ratings...
My Grade: A if considering the movie as a thriller, B- if considering as a horror movie.
Rotten Tomatoes Scores (contains spoilers): Tomatometer=100%, Audience Score=Not Available

Details, Schmeetails...
I Watched Culture Shock on Hulu (bc it's currently exclusive to Hulu AFAIK)
Culture Shock's Wikipedia Page (Contains Spoilers)


This concludes Day 3 of...

Spook Out! Day 2 ~ Behind the Mask: the Rise of Leslie Vernon (2006)

Amazon Says...
"The next great psycho horror slasher has given a documentary crew exclusive access to his life as he plans his reign of terror over the sleepy town of Glen Echo."

I Say...
Dopey twits don't think through implausible opportunity to film the exploits of a serial-killer-in-the-making. (To my great delight.)

Horror Type...
Comedic horror, black comedy, mockumentary.

Main Players...
Nathan Baesel as Leslie Vernon / Leslie Mancuso (He's the serial killer? Really?)
Angela Goethals as Taylor Gentry (Curiously Naive Journalist)
Kate Lang Johnson as Kelly (Leslie's Dream "Survivor Girl")

I liked...

  • the earnestness with which the documentary film crew approaches this study of a wannabe murderer
  • the boyish enthusiasm of said wannabe and how he eagerly explains Serial Killer Practicum 101 to the crew
  • the deliciously dry gruesomeness of this Christopher-Guest-style mockumentary
  • that Scott Wilson, the actor who played the wise and kindly Hershel Greene on The Walking Dead, here portrays a retired serial killer who serves as affable mentor to Leslie Vernon (Hah!)
  • that everybody's favorite striped-shirt-wearing nightmare, Robert Englund, plays the wise and kindly psychiatrist who treated young Leslie and has a bad feeling about all this...
  • how in the third act things smoothly shift from mockumentary to straight-up horror movie

The Meh...
I honestly can't think of one thing about Behind the Mask: the Rise of Leslie Vernon that chaffed my chaps, although I can't help being critical of a film crew who considers the moral implications of standing by while some guy slices and dices others only after he's already started doing it. Comedic-horror flicks are my catnip, so I really just heart this one. (SPOILER ALERT: More so, probs, than the expendable-guy-in-the-movie who literally got his heart handed to him after it was pulled from his chest.)

Would I recommend it...?
Heck yes, I would! I'm already looking forward to watching it again!

Miscellany...
Freaking Hershel Greene! A retired serial killer! (Double Hah!!)

Ratings...
My Grade: A
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: Tomatometer=76%, Audience Score=75%

Details, Schmeetails...
I Watched Behind the Mask: the Rise of Leslie Vernon on Amazon (the Rotten Tomatoes page linked above provides links to other host sites)
Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon's Wikipedia Page (Contains Spoilers)


This concludes Day 2 of...




Wednesday, October 2, 2019

Spook Out! Day 1 ~ The Autopsy of Jane Doe (2016)

Netflix Says...
"A father-son team of small-town coroners performs an autopsy on an unidentified woman with mysterious injuries and a terrifying secret."

I say...
That's a pretty good summary. Bravo, Netflix.

Horror Type...
Supernatural, mystery, medical-procedural

Main Players...
Brian Cox as Tommy Tilden (That's Papa Coroner)
Emile Hirsch as Austin Tilden (Baby Coroner)
Olwen Kelly as Jane Doe (make that Jane Don't bc EEEK!)

I liked...
  • the very methodical, matter-of-fact way the gentlemen go about their work, and the compassion they show their Jane Doe (until it's thoroughly appropriate not to)
  • the vibe, which is moody to start and masterfully builds up the creep factor to 11
  • the pacing, which raised the level of intrigue in a steady, satisfying way
  • the way the story engaged me and made me both desire and dread to learn more about the deceased's origins
  • the way it made me worry about Papa and Baby Coroners
I thought The Autopsy of Jane Doe presented an original idea in an entertaining, hair-raising, way. Also, an occasional view of the body's unmentionables was to be expected, as it was being autopsied after all, but I'm pleased to report there was no gratuitous squickery. (If you will.)

The Meh...
  • Papa Coroner came to some (very kind) conclusions about Jane that I can't agree with, given how the movie ends
  • Important questions are left unanswered (but then, there's probs going to be a sequel)
  • Baby Coroner (medical assistant) had a stereotypically two-dimensional, annoying girlfriend (I liked the actor who played her a lot in her role on Whiskey Cavalier) who served as a mere...what? I don't even know. Plot device? Through her we learn something interesting about the son, but it never develops further because...well, no spoilers here but I just wonder what the point was in even bringing his little secret up as it neither reveals character, nor advances the plot. But that's a minor quibble, bc...

Would I recommend it...?
I would, and I do! Watch it during an ominous storm, if you can. Definitely don't let the sunshine in...

Miscellany...
I knew I recognized Papa Coroner from something or other. But I've looked up his filmography and I still don't know where I've seen him before, lol. (Probably bc he's been in a LOT of stuff!) I have to commend his wonderful American accent in this flick--I had no idea he was a Scot!

Ratings...
My Grade: B+
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: Tomatometer=86%, Audience Score=70%

Details, Schmeetails...
I Watched The Autopsy of Jane Doe on Netflix (the Rotten Tomatoes page linked above provides links to other host sites)


This concludes Day 1 of...


Spook Out!



Le freak c'est chic, y'all!

Last year I watched a different horror movie every day of October. At the time it did occur to me to blog about it (especially since I wasn't blogging all that much and I thought it'd behoove me to get back to it). But I didn't bc depression.

Anyway.

I'm doing the one-horror-movie-a-day thing again this October and felt inspiration nudging me a little harder so what the heck. Uh, I should say, I'm trying to do one-flick-a-day but I'm coming up a bit short (about 5 days short of flicks). I'm trying to keep re-watches to only a couple, if that many, and want to see if I can watch on platforms to which I'm already subscribed so I don't have to dish out too many monies. I may just sprinkle in some stuff from last year that I really liked. Look, you work with whatcha got, OK?

So please stand by as I hope to serve up the spooks soonishly!


Thursday, February 7, 2019

Words, wOrds, WoRDS

Oh online playmates, come out and play with me...

Using the Random Word Generator at CreativityGames.net, I'm going to toss out a word and you're going to share the first thing that comes to your mind, in the comments section below.

Like, if you want to and junk, I ain't the boss o' youse.


Today's random word is...

COFFEE

To learn what came to my mind, select the darkened text between the asterisks.

***

Forget what I'd do for a Klondike bar (which isn't much, bc I'm not all that into them), the things I would do to lay hands on the perfect cuppa joe*...

Ooof!

By which I mean there's a lot I'd consider doing. Unless it required a lot of effort on my part. But, you know, I'd think about it...

***


Go on, then. Reveal unto the world what that word inspired in your little gray cells.

If you dare...


*The things I'd do for the perfect Joe, on the other hand, well! (Ahem.)