The Necronomnomnom by Mike Slater ~ A Belated* First Look

Mike Slater's The Necronomnomnom: Recipes and Rites from the Lore of H. P. Lovecraft is a cookbook written in the charmingly floral but forbidding early 20th C. style of H.P. Lovecraft. Its title, a play on the fictional "Necronomicon" (of which Lovecraft wrote in his cosmic horror) sends me into fits of Wilma Flintstone-esque giggles and I find myself repeating it often bc FUN, and fun's been in short supply for quite some time. Anyway, it's not merely written in Lovecraft's voice, but the recipes are named after creatures and characters from his many mythoi (including Cthulhu, of course), and are tales themselves. Sorta. Lemme 'splain...

The Necronomnomnom is in two parts: the main recipe section, à la Lovecraft, then the appendix, in which we see "the rites revealed." The recipes provide ingredient lists advising, "What Must Be Offered" or "Rise and Obtain," while cooking instructions commence with, "When the Stars are Right," or "To Travel the Void." The appendix section "reveals the rites" by giving us each recipe in more straightforward English (which is not as entertaining as reading that the garlic should be "minced savagely" and the sirloin "ruthlessly cubed"). There's also a handy index, which helps you locate both versions of a particular recipe with relative ease.

We're given fifty recipes in total, for Drinks (such as Herbert West's Deanimator), Appetizers (Atlach-Nachos), Soups and Salads (Pallid Bisque), Main Dishes (Formless Spawnghetti), Sides (Cthus-Koos), Breakfast (The Oats of Dagon), Children's Meals (Cultists in Robes) (not made from actual children) (yes, I checked), and Desserts (The Ring That Should Not Be). Because I love breakfast foods (and bc I'm about as mature as a very young and obnoxious ten-year-old), I'm itching to make the Great Old Buns (aka Very Cross Buns). (BC buns, hun.)

While there are no pictures, there are gorgeous illustrations. Not that you need pics, when the language used is so vivid:

SHOGGHOULASH. Serves 4, under strict hypnotic control

Freeze the creatures and keep them frozen! The bears cannot be trusted. ~ AT THE FOUNTAINS OF MADNESS (Drink)

Bring all to a boil; mutter the incantation, as instructed below, and stir until thickened. ~ NEW ENGLAND DAMNED CHOWDER (Yes, there is an incantation.) (No, you couldn't pay me enough to recite it.)

At first, I thought the old man simply eccentric, and perhaps a bit senile. ~ THE MUESLI OF ERICH ZANN

The pale crystal and ebon flakes may now be scattered atop. ~ LOVECRAFT MACARONI AND CHEESE (Serves 6 to 8 Dark Young, Children's Menu)

...he went at the egg like it done him wrong, beating at it as it went in. ~ JOE SLATER'S IN-BREAD PUDDING

And you don't have to be familiar with Lovecraft's work to enjoy The Necronomnomnom, you just have to have some culinary curiosity and a good sense of humor, coupled with a deep appreciation for the absurd (which, if you're reading my blog, you most assuredly must possess). Plus, if you're craving autumn and Halloween like I am, trying out these recipes can really lift your spirits! (Heh heh. See what I did there? Lift your spirits? Halloween? Yeah...you see what I did there.) 

The Necronomnomnom is available on Amazon (it's $22.46 right now but I bought it during a big price drop within the past week or so, for just $9.98!) and Barnes & Noble, and probably elsewhere but I'm too lazy** to go lookin'.

In a related story, check out this guy's video review of The Necronomnomnom
(and enjoy with me the number of times he says the book's title ~ tee hee)

*"Belated" bc this book came out last fall but I only just got it into my hot little hands
**You knew this about me already, undoubtedly

So, it's been a while...

...what's going on, y'all?

J/K. We all know what's going on. Lots of crazy shit, is what's going on.

So what can we do about...

...Covid-19? We can wash our hands. Not touch our faces. Social distance like MFRs. DO OUR PATRIOTIC DUTY AND WEAR FACE COVERINGS WHEN OUT IN PUBLIC (and not complain about it, FFS).

...systemic racism? We can educate ourselves. We can listen (and endure our discomfort, if we feel any). We can learn. And we can fight it. Because (and it shouldn't need saying, but it absolutely does): BLACK LIVES MATTER.

I've been reading the excellent So You Want To Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo. Salon calls it "...a generous and empathetic yet usefully blunt guide to confronting and interrogating the many ways race informs prejudices that are reinforced by systems of power in America..." I heartily agree and I'm learning a lot.

...coping? Doods, I don't know. I've kind of shut down in some ways, but then I've been in a rough patch since about mid-2018 (well, since far longer than that but at least I could afford antidepressants until then). On the bright side, I didn't turn to alcohol, I quit smoking (again, in April of this year), and I've been modifying my diet to combat the inevitable weight-gain from smoking cessation and a depression exacerbated by job loss. I'm trying to pull myself out of it, to be productive. Slow and steady wins the race, I suppose. But the going is very slow, indeed.

And fuck it ~ sometimes you've just got to blow your dwindling savings on stupid shit like nail polish to let the friggin' sunshine in, all right? Sheesh...

This violet pretty comes from the OPI Summer Collection: Hidden Prism and is called Feeling Optiprismic bc OPI's punny af and I heart them for it.

How've y'all been doing? How've you been dealing? What stupid shit have you spent your money on to bring a bit of joy into your life? Nosy Goth Moms (Lite) wanna know...

Because that's how I'm feeling...

Gen Z Vocab Lesson, Le First

For some time I've been feeling my age in my knees (I know y'all know what I mean). But perhaps only today did I feel depressingly long in the tooth.

I took a Facebook quiz.

Specifically, a zooquiz titled "React to These Gen Z Problems and We'll Guess Your Age." (Go on, I'll wait here while you check it out.)

As I took the quiz I'd occasionally hit on a word or phrase that'd make my brain go all blue screen of death. I'd mentally reboot and could eventually glean meaning from context but I did have to look some stuff up. Made me feel ancient.

Now, I'm not gonna rail against the liberties taken with the English language by Gen Z, mainly bc I heart words and I take my own liberties at will. As creative self-expression, slang is super groovy and reflects so much about the era from which it originates (and differs from simple/stupid grammatical errors, as it's the deliberate use of a coined word/phrase, or the use of a pre-existing word in a new way). I just want to keep up and, at minimum, understand what the flip's going on around me. And yeah, maybe I'll be that mom who salts her speech with it. At any rate, as a public service to my fellow Gen Xers (Boomers are welcome, if they're so inclined), here's your...

Gen Z Vocab Lesson, Le First

feeling some kind of way

• Can indicate having negative feelings about something/someone. Can also indicate a range of feelings held simultaneously, whose complexity precludes definition or explanation, but may be troublesome or uncomfortable to experience. May also be a euphemism for sexual arousal. (Le rawr RAWR.)
• Origin: Possibly this 2013 tune.
• See also feeling some type of way.

leaving you on read

• On a messaging app equipped to let you know your message's recipient has read/seen your message, the "read" signal appears but your recipient takes an inordinate amount of time to reply (or doesn't reply at all). (Rude! This one's pretty easy to grok from the context, but in service to thoroughness...)
• Origin: Circa 2011, with "read receipts" for digital communications. Probs. Though this kind of nonsense is pretty old behavior (you know, like the guy who says he'll call but takes his sweet time doing it).

finna

• Contraction of "fixing to," as in "I'm fixing to go food shopping." Similar to gonna for "going to." (I have to admit, I thought this was an autocorrect fail for "gonna" when I first saw it.)
• Origin: "Fixing to"=American South 1700s; "finna" first recorded in late 1980s hip hop music.

mood/big mood

• Tagging an image with "mood" indicates that the tagger finds the concept it conveys highly relatable, or wishes to relate to it. Similar to when people respond to an online post with "Same."
• Origin: Black Twitter circa 2015.

shriv

• An old-timer. Also, a jerk.
• Origin: Old folks' shriveled skin (particularly that of the scrotum). (Ouch and ick.)

extra

• Over the top, dramatic behavior. (Another one fairly easy to glean from the context.)
• Origin: First recorded on Urban Dictionary in 2003.

bish

• Variant of "bitch."
• Origin: First recorded on Urban Dictionary in 2004.

clapback

• Quick response or comeback, returning fire.
• Origin: Likely this 2003 tune.

yeet

• Interjection of surprise, strong approval, excitement. May also be used when hurling something or slam-dunking in basketball, etc.
• Origin: A dance first recorded on YouTube in 2014.

Dudes! All of these^ from one little quiz! Which, BTW, guessed me to be 38, an "an old-AF millennial." Hah! (And don't I just wish!)

Go on then, let me know in the comments if you were familiar with any/all of these, and if you took the quiz, lemme know whatcha got!

Spook Out! Day 31 ~ Train to Busan (2016, in Korean with English Subtitles)

Netflix Says...
"As a zombie outbreak sweeps the country, a dad and his daughter take a harrowing train journey in an attempt to reach the only city that's still safe."

I Say...
Actually, they were already on the train when the shit hit the fan, but yeah, it was a harrowing ride, all right!

Horror Type...
Zombie Apocalypse, Thriller, Action

Main Players...
Gong Yoo as Seok-woo (Hot Workaholic Dad)
Kim Su-an as Su-an (Kind of a Pain But Still Precious Daughter)
Jung Yu-mi as Seong-kyeong (Baller Pregnant Lady)
Ma Dong-seok as Sang-hwa (Hero)

I liked...

• how this film made me hold my breath repeatedly; it takes you to the edge and brings you back till you're utterly worn out
• that you really get a sense of who the leads are and what motivates them (apart from wanting to get the freak away from snapping zombie jaws); a lotta heart in this film, too
• how it breaks from some zombie rules (no shamblers here) and creates interesting new ones
• the use of wit as well as brawn to get out of tough spots
• how well the worst, and the best, of humanity is represented here
• that it's so engrossing you don't even feel the length of the movie till it's over and you realize nearly two hours have gone by

The Meh...
There is no meh in this award-winning film.

Would I recommend it...?

Absolutely, positively, 100-Gajillion-Percent. You have to watch this. HAVE TO. Yes, it's gory; yes, the zombies run; yes, it's violent af. But you have to watch this brilliantly terrifying movie.

Miscellany...

• The zombie apocalypse, like life, is not fair. Not even a little bit.
• As the credits started rolling I was bawling into some napkins. But rest easy--it's emotional, not schmaltzy.
• Though I'm a few days late, I've saved you the best movie for last. You're welcome. Go frigging watch it. Now.

Ratings...

My Grade: A+
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: Tomatometer=93%, Audience Score=88%

Details, Schmeetails...

I Watched Train to Busan on Netflix (the Rotten Tomatoes page linked above provides links to other host sites)

Train to Busan's IMDb Page

Train to Busan's Wikipedia Page (Contains Spoilers)

This concludes day 31 (and, indeed, the blogfest!) of

Spook Out! Day 30 ~ He Never Died (2015)

Netflix Says...
"A reclusive immortal who needs human flesh but tries to stay clean finds himself cast back into society by a gang of thugs and his estranged daughter."

I Say...
Kids, man. They can really disrupt your reclusive immortality, know what I'm sayin'? Actually, the above summary gets one thing wrong--she's not his estranged daughter bc he never knew of her existence till this movie.

Horror Type...
Horror Comedy, Dark Comedy

Main Players...
Henry Rollins as Jack (Reclusive Immortal)

Kate Greenhouse as Cara (Loyal Waitress)

Jordan Todosey as Andrea Huntsman (Life-disrupting Daughter)

I liked...

• the dry, deadpan style of Rollins' delivery
• how the normalcy of the waitress and daughter contrast so starkly with Jack's...well, everything
• that Jack enjoys a good game of Bingo now and again
• that, at least in the movie, Jack shows mercy

The Meh...

• it's a little too dry
• it's also a little too long
• the pacing was sluggish in the first act and maybe the first part of the second act

Would I recommend it...?

It's an OK watch but not really a horror movie, IMO. (To be fair, I'm not sure why I thought it was one.) Pretty violent and gory, though.

Miscellany...

That Mr. Rollins is a fine lookin' fella. Le rawr RAWR!

Ratings...

My Grade: C+
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: Tomatometer=87%, Audience Score=64%

Details, Schmeetails...

I Watched He Never Died on Netflix (the Rotten Tomatoes page linked above provides links to other host sites)

He Never Died's IMDb Page

He Never Died's Wikipedia Page (Contains Spoilers)

This concludes day 30 of

Spook Out! Day 29 ~ Us (2019)

Amazon Says...
"The visionary behind Get Out returns with an original nightmare, pitting an endearing American family against a terrifying and uncanny opponent: doppelgängers of themselves."

I Say...
^An accurate summary.

Horror Type...
Thriller

Main Players...
Lupita Nyong'o as Adelaide Wilson (née Thomas)/Red (Mama Bear)
Winston Duke as Gabriel "Gabe" Wilson/Abraham (Papa Bear)
Shahadi Wright Joseph as Zora Wilson/Umbrae (Sister Bear)
Evan Alex as Jason Wilson/Pluto (Brother Bear)

I liked...

• the undercurrent of wrongness from the very start
• the sustained tension from the moment Jason makes his startling announcement to his family
• how, and this was my favorite part, the family falls into its familiar bickering in one particular scene when peril's closing in around them
• the flashing back and forth from Adelaide's first encounter with the weird in 1986 to the present day madness
• that the menace was on a wider scale than I'd thought going into this film

The Meh...

• the first act is somewhat dry and runs longer than necessary to establish things
• there's a Big Reveal in the third act, which fits well, then a surprise twist at the end, which also fits well. However, the two don't, in my mind, fit one another for this movie--that is, given the twist, the way the Big Reveal took place doesn't make sense to me

Would I recommend it...?

Yeah, it's a great thriller for Halloween! There's some violence and a bit of gore but all appropriate and not overdone.

Miscellany...

I raved about Lupita Nyong'o in a previous review and must do so again here--she's fan-freaking-tastic and should be in All The Things, ever.

Ratings...

My Grade: B+
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: Tomatometer=93%, Audience Score=60%

Details, Schmeetails...

I Watched Us on Amazon (the Rotten Tomatoes page linked above provides links to other host sites)

Us' IMDb Page

Us' Wikipedia Page (Contains Spoilers)

This concludes day 29 of Spook Out!

For some reason, Blogger's upload picture function is not, in fact, allowing me to upload pics. Alas.

Spook Out! Day 28 ~ Ramekin (2018)

Amazon Says...
"Emily...[is] a college girl in New York City coming to live in the spacious Upper West Side apartment of her recently-deceased grandmother. There she encounters a little white porcelain cup--a ramekin--that slowly begins to control her life and demand the unthinkable."

I Say...
^That's exactly right and BOY what a ride!

Horror Type...
Horror Comedy, Surreal, Supernatural

Main Players...
Jamie Saunders as Emily (Tidy College Girl)
Renee Adrienne Vito as Jane (The BFF with the Stupid Face)
Adriano La Rocca as Mark (The Cute But Clueless Neighbor)

I liked...
I've been bullet-pointing for this section in my previous reviews but for Ramekin I'm going stream-of consciousness bc that's the only way I can think to tackle it right now.

I love how precise all of Emily's motions are, down to her diction and phrasing. Her face is wonderfully expressive and that big-ass smile she whips out is both beautiful and terrifying. I dig that she gets a few moments of grace to see that something's terribly wrong and she's not quite herself and wants to get out of whatever hell she's in. But she can't bc Ramekin.

I adore surreal humor, and this horror-comedy is just that. I mean, it's a ridiculous situation--being controlled by a ramekin? A ramekin??? Yet, the writing and Saunders' amazing work really sell it for me. Some of the dialogue made me cringe, other bits made me literally laugh out loud. And then there were these moments when a lick of terror seriously shot through me as I sat there helpless (much like Emily, but without any cupcakes, more's the pity).

The "poetry" in this is risible, when it's not utterly chilling. (Mark, how could you not understand?????)

The soundtrack's groovy!

Also, any New Yorker can appreciate that the only way a college student could lay claim to a lovely furnished apartment on Manhattan's Upper West Side is if it were haunted or possessed by...something. (HAH!)

The Meh...
There's a bit in the beginning when Emily's trying to leave Ramekin in the dish rack that goes on a little long and could lose a viewer's interest--but stick with it!

The ending's even more bizarre and I couldn't quite grok it till I read writer/director/ filmmaker Cody Clarke's (or someone bearing his handle) explanation in this Reddit thread.

Would I recommend it...?

Yes! It's kooky and it's creepy, hilariously freaky, it's altogether unique-y--and for Amazon Primers, free! I heart this film so much I'm including a teaser for it:

Miscellany...

Please watch this ultra indie movie (made on a $500 budget!). Let's support indie artists so Hollywood gets the message that we don't want remakes, we want original creative voices!!!

Ratings...

My Grade: A-
Article #2: Ramekin Review!
Regrettably, there's no Rotten Tomatoes page for Ramekin.

Details, Schmeetails...

I Watched Ramekin on Amazon

Ramekin's IMDb Page

A Wikipedia Page for Ramekin does not currently exist.

This concludes day 28 of